Monday, October 26, 2009

Can't sleep so I pray and think

I can't sleep, so I thought I would blog a little. As I was tossing and turning I was thinking a lot and praying. I was praying for many people and many things. I was praying for people I don't know like Kate and Tanner who are 2 adorable girls fighting cancer. I was praying for my little sister and my friend Jane and for their future husbands. They both want to one day get married. And I was praying for my parents. I was thanking God for blessing me with 2 great parents. And I was praying for wisdom with the decision of where they should live. I haven't blogged about this much, because I think it is to hard, but you see, my parents house burned down on June 14, 2009. They are renting a house 1/2 a block from our house, and will be staying there until February. After that, they are not sure where they will be living. They have a very difficult decision to make. Do they move closer to Fort Wayne, Indiana where my brother (their son), his wife, and their 3 children and my mom's brother and his family live? Do they stay around this area that they are living in now because their other children (me, my 2 sisters, and my other brother and our families) live. They have a tough decision to make.

While I was praying for my parents and thinking about them, I began thinking about some of the things that were lost in the fire. You see my parents, and my little sister who was living in the house at the time, pretty much lost everything. (sorry for the run on sentence, but it is 3:45 a.m.) God blessed them in that everyone was able to get out of the house safely and was not injured at all. They were also blessed because a lot of their photo albums and other photos were saved because one room in the house did not get much damage at all. Most of the albums and photographs happened to be in that room. This was pretty much the only room in the house that was not completely gone. In the other rooms almost nothing was salvageable. While I was thinking, my thinking became a little selfish. I still had a few items at my parents house. I had a few containers in the basement of childhood memories and keepsakes, and some of that stuff was salvaged. I have a vest that I loved and wore when I was a little girl. I had saved that and hoped one day my daughter would wear that. Well guess what, that was saved from the fire, and was almost in perfect condition. But one thing I lost in the fire was a box of books. This box of books was on in my parents enclosed front porch for a few weeks before the fire. My husband and I had seen the box and kept meaning to put it in our car. But, with the baby and all of his stuff we usually did not have enough hands to carry it to the car on our way out or we would forget. Then we would tell ourselves that we would get it next time we were over there. The box mostly had some of my favorite books or medical books in it, all which can be replaced. But their was once "special book" I cannot replace. It was a scrapbook of sorts. When I graduated college my parents threw me a graduation party. My older sister got a special notebook/journal. She passed this journal around my party and had everyone at the party write memories, well wishes, stories or anything else that they wanted to write for me or about me. Some people congratulated me on getting my bachelors degree. Others wished me well as I started a new chapter of my life. Some reminisced of the past. Others told "Allie stories." This book meant a lot to me and was the best graduation gift ever. Most of my friends and family wrote in this book. Then later, I took some of the cards that I got from my graduation party, and put them in the book as well. As I thought about this book, I so wished we had remembered to put that box in our car. I am so bummed. I wish I could read what people wrote in that book. Of course, I don't remember everything written in that book. I don't remember much at all, but I know most of what was written in that book made me cry. I remember my Auntie Ree wrote about how she used to call me her "curly top" because of my curly hair. I remember my sister writing such fond memories of our time growing up and of all my funny stories. I remember my Auntie Gin writing about the "dog story." And I'm pretty sure my mom's entry was the longest. I am sad that I won't be able to show that book to my children when they are older. But I am trying not to think so selfishly. You see most of my stuff was out of the house. But my little sister had everything she owned in that house because she still lived there. And of course my parents lost almost everything as well. They lost so many things that meant so much to them. Like, the bench my Uncle Pat made my mom from a pew of the church he was a pastor at that had to close. Or the tea kettle that was my Grandma's ( my dad's mom), and was a prized possession of his because it was one of the only thing he had that was his mom's. I could go on and on. I want you to know, I am soooooo grateful and blessed. I am so grateful that my family is all here with me and they all got of the house safely. But, my parent's house fire was very hard for everyone, but especially for my parents and my little sister. It was hard to see my childhood home, where my parents lived for 31 years, demolished. My parents moved into that house when I was 1 1/2 years old. Now all that is there is an one hundred year old tree. That is hard.

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